"Daddy!"
"I'll be right there,"
Ned called over his shoulder. "Got your pajamas out yet?"
Cole made some indistinct reply,
and Ned was smiling faintly as he walked into the other bedroom. "How's it
going?"
Samantha tucked a lock of her
red-gold hair behind her ear and glanced up at her stepfather, gracing him with
a brief smile. "Okay," she said. "Almost done." The
butterfly-patterned curtains were pulled back and Ned could see the faint
moving trails of rain against the panes. A math textbook stood open on the
desk, and Samantha's designer binder was open to a page scribbled over with
problems.
Ned glanced over them.
"Want me to look them over when you're done?"
Samantha glanced up again.
"Sure," she said, then ducked her head back toward her work.
Ned sighed inaudibly as he left
his stepdaughter's room. She was always subdued and wary toward him after her
time with Frank. He hated it more than he hated Sam's biological father, and
after four years as Nancy's husband, he was glad he had only shared as many
conversations with the man. Interactions between Nancy and her ex-husband were
as civil as they had to be, for their child, but no one had expected relations
to be anywhere near polite between the two men in Nancy's life.
But Ned had loved Sam
practically since the first moment he had seen her. She was beautiful, and when
Ned looked into her face he saw the woman he had loved for most of his life
reflected there. He couldn't deny the hurt he felt when those beautiful blue
eyes were shuttered against him. Even though he would have adopted her in a
second, he wasn't her father, and Frank was doing all he could to make sure Ned
never would be.
"Daddy!"
Cole, dressed only in superhero
briefs, his hair still damp from his bath, had managed to find and strew all
his pajamas over his bedroom floor. Ned swept his son up into his arms and
tousled his dark hair, and the boy shrieked with laughter. "When I said
get your pajamas out, I didn't mean like this."
"Story!"
"Pajamas first," Ned
said, leaning over to sweep a pair up from the carpet. "Blue?"
"Blue," Cole nodded
seriously.
Ned stifled a laugh. "And
pick a good story, please."
Cole had an entire low shelf
full of hand-me-down picture books, but he bypassed those in favor of a
laminated, finger-marked and yarn-bound flip book. "Max the cat."
"Your favorite," Ned
said, looking down at the book. "All right. Up we go."
Cole crawled over the spaceship
comforter and slipped underneath swiftly, pulling it up to his chin. Ned
stretched out on top of the comforter, his feet hanging over the edge of the
mattress, and flipped to the first page. Then he glanced over at his son, whose
dark brown eyes met his own. "I think you'd better read."
"Tired," Cole
protested.
Ned faked a huge yawn. "So
am I," he said.
"No," Cole said
stubbornly, then grinned. "You read. Please, Daddy? Please?"
"All right," Ned said,
mock begrudging. "You sure you want Max the cat?"
"Yes," Cole said,
laughing, his eyes lighting up.
Ned watched his son closely, and
during the third reading, Cole's eyes began to flutter closed for longer and
longer blinks. Ned was silent for a long moment, not moving his gaze, and when
Cole's face was blank and relaxed, Ned pressed a gentle kiss over his forehead,
then eased himself off the bed. He had just replaced the book on the desk and
turned off the bedside lamp when he noticed the silhouette in the doorway.
"You're ready?"
He caught the faint smile on
Samantha's face before she turned around and walked back to her own bedroom.
"Finished," she said.
Ned pulled his son's bedroom
door nearly closed, leaving him alone with the distant whisper of the rain,
before going into Sam's room. She vanished into the bathroom, then came back in
a set of pastel pajamas, while Ned flipped through the textbook, refreshing his
memory.
"When's Mom going to be
home?"
Ned glanced up. "Pretty
soon," he said, as the first rumble of thunder reached them. "She
just went out with Bess and George for dinner." He smiled. "Do you
not trust my math skills?"
Sam smiled. "Who's better
at math, you or Mom?"
Ned thought for a minute.
"I think we're about the same," he admitted. "Can you tell me
why you did this?" he said, tapping on the sheet.
Sam swept up a much-loved
stuffed dog and hugged it to her chest as she looked down at what he had
indicated. "The teacher told us to do it this way instead of how it has it
in the book. She said it was too complicated the other way."
Ned nodded. "Okay,
then," he said. "You forgot to carry the three here, but that's the
only thing I saw."
Sam sat back down at the foot of
her bed, her chin against the top of the stuffed dog's head.
"Thanks," she said.
Ned turned around in the desk
chair and looked at his stepdaughter. "Sam..."
"Daddy?"
Ned looked at the doorway, where
his son stood. "Cole? Did the storm scare you?"
Cole looked away instead of
directly answering. "Water?"
Sam scrambled off the bed.
"I'll go get it," she said, ruffling her brother's hair as she
maneuvered around him.
Cole took a few steps into Sam's
room, timidly, then with more confidence as Ned patted his knee. He swept his
son up onto his lap, and Cole rested his head against his father's chest. The
lightning flashed against the window and Cole squeezed his eyes closed.
"You okay?"
Cole nodded. "Mommy home
soon?"
"Yes," Ned said.
"Mommy will be home soon."
Samantha came back and handed
her brother a glass of water, which he sipped greedily. She pushed herself back
onto the bed, taking the stuffed dog into her arms again. Ned looked down at it
and smiled.
"What were you
saying?"
"I gave you that," Ned
said faintly. "When you were a baby."
Sam looked down at her stuffed
dog. "You wanted to talk about my dog?"
Ned shook his head. "Was
everything‹did you have a good time with your father?"
Sam nodded. "Sure,"
she said, looking away.
Ned looked down at his son,
drawing his fingertips over the soft dark hair. "You just seem like you're
upset about something."
Sam shrugged, but she pressed
her cheek against the dog. "I'm okay."
Cole slumped down. "I worry
about you," Ned said, as Cole nestled his face into the comforter on Sam's
bed. "But if you're okay."
Sam looked away. "For as
long as I can remember," she said, "it was you and Dad... and Mom.
You've been here, and..."
Ned nodded, as Cole made a soft
noise and shifted in his sleep.
"Daddy's getting
married."
Ned felt his face warm.
"Oh."
Sam slipped down and curled up
in a ball, the dog still tight in her arms. "To Callie."
"How do you feel about
it?"
Sam shook her head. "He's
my Dad," she said, her voice muffled. "And I see him‹and she's going
to be my stepmother. That's what Dad says."
Ned nodded. "Like I'm your
stepdad, Callie will be your stepmother."
Sam looked down. "I don't
want a stepmother," she mumbled.
Ned looked at his son for a long
minute, lifted him up and slipped him onto the foot of Sam's bed, where he
nestled silently into the mattress. Then he went to sit at Sam's side, looking
down at her. "Do you not like Callie?"
Sam turned her head and Ned could
see tears gleaming on her lower lashes. "She's not Mom," she said.
Ned swallowed. "And I'm not
your Dad," he said softly.
Sam looked up at him.
"You've been here," she said. "I've had this dog as long as I
can remember. So you've been here longer than I can remember."
Ned smiled a little and shook
his head. "You had just turned two when I met you the first time," he
said softly. "Your dad was away on a business trip and your mom was out
with you for a run."
Sam smiled. "How long had
you loved Mom?"
"From the moment I met
her."
"How long did you love
me?"
"From the moment I met
you," Ned said, brushing her hair back from her face. "Callie's not a
bad person."
"You know her?"
Ned looked away. "We
met," he said. When everything was different. When I still thought
you'd be my flesh and blood.
Sam blinked up at him.
"Mommy too?"
"Mommy's met her."
Sam buried her face against the
dog as another enormous bolt of lightning split the sky in a flash of brilliant
white light. "So you're okay with it."
Ned looked down at his
stepdaughter, the proof of her union with Frank Hardy, the proof of her
infidelity. He looked over at Cole, the product of their union. "Frank was
meant to be with Callie."
"Not with Mommy."
Suddenly Ned felt the pressure
of his fingers in his palm and consciously released them. He sighed. "I
didn't mean to say it like that," he said softly. "If you're
uncomfortable with Callie, if you don't..."
"Dad said." She looked
away from him. "Every time I see him Dad says that you aren't my father.
That he's my father, my only father, for the rest of my life. Now Callie's
going to be my stepmother." She shook her head. "I don't believe
him."
"About what?" Ned
whispered.
She kept looking away. "Are
you ever going to go away?"
Ned shook his head. "I'm
not going to leave you behind," he said. "You or Mom or Cole, for the
rest of my life."
"What if." Sam shook
her head. "Mommy and Dad were together, a long time ago, and they swore
they'd never leave, and they did, and now, there's Callie, and..."
Ned shook his head. "Is
that what you're afraid of?"
"That you'll stop loving me
the way Dad stopped loving me."
"Oh, Sam," Ned said,
leaning over and pulling her into a hug. "Your dad didn't stop loving you,
and I'm not going to stop loving you. I'm not."
Sam buried her face against his
chest. "If he loves me then why is he marrying someone else," she
said into his shirt.
Ned rubbed her back. "He's
loved Callie for a long time," he said. "I loved your mom for a long
time. And your mom, and your dad..." He swallowed hard. "Sam, they've
always loved you."
"But it wasn't
enough."
Ned looked down at the little
girl in his arms. Two years spent away from Nancy, he had cursed the child who
had taken her away from him and bound her irrevocably to Frank Hardy. For as
long as Sam lived, his wife was connected to Sam's father, and Ned had found
himself resenting the tiny red-haired toddler whose very existence meant Nancy
would never entirely be his. But Sam had managed to change his mind, and while
he slowly discovered that he had never stopped loving Nancy, he began to love
her daughter as though she was his own. To see Sam in pain, over the decisions
he and Nancy had made so many years before...
"Sam, I'm so sorry."
She looked up at him.
"You're my dad," she said. "I don't care what he says. You're my
dad too. He never looks at my math homework and he never reads books to me
until I go to sleep."
Ned closed his eyes and kissed
the top of her head. "It's gonna be okay," he said.
She nodded. "Okay."
When Nancy swept in, laughing,
her sandals dangling from her hand, she found her husband in Sam's room,
lifting Cole into his arms, Sam's sleeping face lit by the occasional flash of
lightning. Nancy went silent but the smile still stayed on her face.
"Everything okay?" she
whispered, when Ned slipped out of Sam's bedroom.
"He doesn't like
rain," Ned replied, making his way to his son's bed, slipping him under
the covers. With both their children's bedroom doors closed, he slipped his arm
around Nancy's waist and drew her to him, side by side as they reached their
own bedroom. "Or storms. Or his mother being away. And I just had a
very... I just talked to your daughter."
Nancy smiled as she shut their
bedroom door behind them. "'Your' daughter," she repeated. "Sam
must've done something wrong."
Ned shook his head. "She
was just worried, after..."
"After what?"
Nancy had dressed for her
evening out in a black tank top and clinging black skirt, which she stripped
off in front of him, and Ned swallowed before he could continue. "Frank
and Callie."
"Oh," Nancy said, and
Ned stepped out of his own clothes. "They're seeing each other."
"From what Sam was telling
me, I think they're getting married."
Nancy smiled. "Good. I'm
happy for them."
Ned pulled back the covers on
their bed and crawled in, and Nancy followed. "Nan."
She pulled her bra off and
dropped it over the side. "What's wrong?"
He sighed. "I love
you," he said. "And I love Sam and I love Cole and I can't imagine
what my life would be like right now without... this. Without us."
Nancy slipped her palms against
his cheeks and met his eyes. "All this because Frank and Callie are getting
married."
He shook his head. "All
this because I was afraid... for Sam. I wanted her to be okay. And she told me,
tonight, that I was more a father to her than Frank was. She told me
that."
Nancy leaned down and kissed
him, her hair brushing over his chest, his cheek. "I told you that
too," she whispered. "Six years ago. You're the best father Sam and
Cole will ever know. You are the only man I've ever loved."
He buried his hand in her hair
and kissed her, over and over. "I love you," he breathed. "You've
always been the only one."
She smiled against his mouth.
She tasted like vodka and fruit and sugar, rum, something dark and exotic. She
tasted so familiar and he lost himself in it. "I love you too," she
whispered. "I love you. I love you. And I'm glad Sam realizes how good a
father you are to her."
"Do you ever wish... that
things had gone differently?"
Nancy kissed him again, slow and
sweet. "The only thing I wish," she murmured, "is that we had
found each other sooner."
He smiled. "No
regrets," he whispered, putting his arms around her and pulling her close
to him. She leaned in and their mouths met in another slow kiss.
"No regrets."
They lay skin to skin, his mouth
finding the soft curve of her throat, the depression of her shoulder, the taut
flesh between her breasts. He cupped the gentle slope of one breast in his palm
and took her nipple in his mouth, and she arched, laughing softly. She pulled
back, her tongue dipping into the hollow behind his ear, the valley of his
collarbone, the tensing flesh over his abs. He traced his palms to the backs of
her upper thighs and bent her knees, urging her to straddle him. His touch
stroked over the curve of her hips and he closed his eyes as she moved over
him.
"Nan."
She raked a hand through her
hair, pulling it away from her face as she knelt over him. He watched the way
her expression changed when his fingers pressed into her flesh, the lightest
caress over the thin delicate skin of her inner thigh, the way her mouth dropped
open in unabashed anticipation when he traced his fingers over the warmth
between her thighs. She let out a low moan as she mounted him, and he closed
his eyes, lost in the perfume of her, the feel of her tight against him.
He traced his fingers and his
lips over her after, slow, tasting their mingled scent on her skin. She pulled
his face up to hers and kissed him hard. "Love you," she mumbled
against his mouth.
"Love you," he
whispered, pulling her to him, nestling against her, and they were safe, warm,
content in each other's arms. "All of you."
She smiled against his chest, her
fingertips tracing over his shoulder blade. "Never stop," she
whispered. "Never stop."